Your values are the core of your unique purpose. When you live in alignment with your values they provide the fuel for expressing and manifesting that purpose. When you are out of alignment with your values you experience dislocation, frustration, and energy loss. There are many possible values and most of us subscribe to dozens, if not hundreds, of different values. What makes us unique and gives direction to our individual journeys is the way in which each of us prioritizes our values. For me, authenticity is my A-number-one core value. Out of my utter commitment to and alignment with authenticity, I express many additional values including joy, prosperity, and spontaneity.

The advantage of knowing our core values is that we can create a values matrix against which to measure our goals and options. When we know what moves us most deeply and act in accordance with that knowledge we become powerfully congruent. We can let go of the multitude of almost-but-not-quite-right options that otherwise clutter and confuse our lives.

I invite you to clarify your own values by sitting with each of the following questions.

1. Think about a specific moment in your life when you felt deeply engaged or fulfilled. What was going on? What made this moment special? What values were you honoring in this moment?
2. Reflect on a recent experience of intense frustration or anger. What were the circumstances? How did you feel? Was there a value that was being violated or suppressed? For instance, if you were feeling cornered and manipulated, were you reacting to the violation of your value of freedom or authenticity?
3. What do your friends know they can count on you for? What value does this express?
4. What do you take to extremes? Perfectionism? Punctuality? Or? What value is satisfied by this extreme? Is your attachment to this value a limitation or an extension of your effectiveness?
5. Brainstorm possible core values. It can be helpful to cluster words around a value such as authenticity/integrity/honesty or simplicity/honesty/predicatbility. List as many values or clusters of values as you can. Then rate each value in terms of its importance in your life from a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being relatively unimportant and 10 being of ultimate importance. What are your top ten values? Can you identify your top three? The A-number-one value for you?

When yours shows up during coaching, invite it to step outside until you are finished.